truth.
Almost 3am can't sleep, too much thinking. Update on my life it sucks. I'm put in a difficult position. Afraid to ask others for help, no lie. I guess I don't want other people to worry about me. I still don't have a job, its not easy getting one. How do I get money you ask? I sell my shoes to get by. I hate this side of me, I really do. I wish I can go back in time and start over. I've gone through so much pain. I have no parents. Always did things on my own. With no help, just me myself & I. I procastinate, which I HATE. Fuck. Funny because I thought I was better person. I guess not, haha. I want to go far away and never return. My dad didn't want me to stay in california. He wanted me to go move to florida. Some dad he is, right? He was careless through out my whole life. Not really a father figure, but just an asshole. If you knew my life. You would be like "damn, how did you make it through life?" Might as well get my act together. Suck it up and try again. I always tried to look on the bright side. Guess what? There wasn't a bright side. I don't know what's wrong with me.I really don't know when I was actually... happy. I haven't felt that way in a long time.
6 comments:
go to sleeepppppp
damn i actually read the entry. stay up girlpren! hahah
i'll donate $5 to the rockthesole fund... but i only have paypal right now LOL
aww man...keep ya head up girl
(and congrats on 40 months with your babe :] )
your just like me. eh its "life"
Stay strong babygirl. I've been in situations where I hit rock bottom & the best advice that was given to me was that, "the only way to go is up".. What I'm trying to say is things will get better & as cliche as that sounds, it'll happen. I know it's probably something you don't want to hear coz it seems like it's not getting better, no job, and no support, but whether your parents are there or not, you'll get there & it'll all be worth it & you can throw that in their face. The feeling inside you will be much sweeter than the average person that does have a job, that does get a little support from their parents & that doesn't have as many problems, because at least you can say you were strong enough to survive through some difficult times in your life.
I don't even know if that made sense but I was constantly interrupted by my dog. Hahaha.
But like I said, stay strong babygirl, I know you'll get through anything.
Feel better. You I know I got you if anything.
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